Sunday, August 15, 2010

There is no last

Recently, in the span of a month, I was involved in 2 performances. It was such a good feeling to be part of a routine again. I am also very happy about the formation of ASTROS, finally something which we had been talking about for the past few years had came true; the formation of a team with like minded passionate cheerleaders whose goals are to push the limits of cheerleading, and a team that can focus entirely on that without the pressures of nationals or competitions.

With ASTROS, I got the chance to perform again, after more than 3 years. My last performance was at Singapore Recreation Club on 29th June 2007; it was quite a emotional one for me, and I wrote a blog post for it - First at the last

Like I mentioned in the post, this was the last of over more than 50 performances I did throughout my cheer life till then, and for my "swansong", I was going to attempt to do a cupie in the routine. But well sadly I failed the cupie, and I was really devastasted then (you can ask snow about that and maybe that's why on our way home I did a Standing Back Tuck on the concrete ground of the MRT Platform. haha). I shall post my "last performance"; watch how I failed my cupie - I am the centre PS group during the opening.

So it was really nice to be able to do a cupie in my first "comeback" performance and chase all the "demons" away from my head now. And then to further erase any self doubts that I had, I got the chance to do a toss cupie in our 2nd performance.

Reading back, I really liked my post First at the last. A quote from from the post:

"But what about if you failed at your last attempt? Does it signal that the time is not ripe yet, that you still have unfinished business for it to be the last? Well I guess I will not find out until the moment comes. Will I go for it one more "last" time?"

And the moment came it did. And I found out the answer to that question 3 years ago. Indeed my time is not up yet, I was not ripe and ready 3 years back (to do the cupie), but now I am back for the harvest. I believe now that there will never be a "last time" for me. I quote from First at the last again:

"This story just tells me there is no such thing as the last time, there is always unpredictable number of times, and the road is never ending, unless you decide to end it yourself. It is about how much you wanted it.

Hopes and dreams are always out there to be achieved, you never know when you are not going to make it, unless you give up on your on hopes and dreams. The last time may very well also be your first time. Never quit on your passion, for one day your dreams will be realised in one form or another. You just have to believe!"

P.S: Even now with the full up cupie done, I will not quit. Hopefully in future when I look back and read this post, double up is done.

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